


No One Hates Me Like I Do

by momotastic



Series: Road to Nowhere [2]
Category: Mad Max Series (Movies), Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Mad Max Fusion, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Child Abuse, Child Death, Disfigurement, M/M, Self-Harm, Underage Rape/Non-con, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-18 16:01:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11877930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momotastic/pseuds/momotastic
Summary: It's the worst night of Gwaine's life - and that's saying something when you're forced to murder and pillage for Emperor Uther Pendragon on a regular basis.





	No One Hates Me Like I Do

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bonus scene to my ACBB 2017 story "Road of Ruins". In the story, Gwaine occasionally remembers the night when Leon lost his eye. This is the story of that night.
> 
> Please heed the warnings. For details, check the notes at the end of this piece. There be spoilers!

It was a mission like any other. The six of them, two cars, and the order to bring back as much lifestock and loot as they possibly could.

Lifestock of course being people. Women, mostly, or strong men.

Gwaine hated that this is what they’d become. He wasn’t anything other than a hunting dog now, and the people of this country prey. Leon, Lance, and him, the three of them tried to prevent the worst when they were on a mission, but the other three Devils didn’t have any scruples about what they were doing. They took everything they got their hands on.

They’ve been with Leon, Lance, and Gwaine for a couple of months already. Frequently the squad rotated through new arrivals when one Devil, or sometimes two, got killed on the road.

Neither of the three of them tried to make it too obvious that they were the ones killing their squad members, but the longer they did it, the more suspicious they became. That’s why they’ve been with these men for much longer than Gwaine normally endured.

As they approached the small settlement they’d found, Gwaine thinks that soon he’d have to get rid of at least one of them, just for some peace of mind.

Probably Kanen, because he was the worst of the lot.

They’re doing their usual walk around the settlement. Leon and Lance are off “robbing” the elderly, and Kanen’s two friends are currently harassing younger men. Gwaine, as ever, keeps an eye on Kanen, but a fight breaks out between three women and Gwaine heads over there to stop it before it can end worse than it has to.

Unfortunately, while he tries to explain to these women that he won’t hurt them or drag them anywhere if they can just shut up and make themselves scarce, Kanen disappears.

Gwaine finds him a couple of minutes later inside a tent, trousers down around his ankles.

Bile rises in Gwaine’s throat, and he shoots without even hesitating for a second.

It’s what Gwaine sees after Kanen’s crumpled to the floor that makes his blood run cold.

Not that he didn’t expect some of it. The boy is young, much too young to be doing anything like what Kanen made him do. And Gwaine would’ve hoped that as he grew up, he’d forget that this happened to him – that’s how young he is.

Which only makes it worse that there’s blood running down his too skinny, dirty chest. A lot of blood, much more than such a tiny body should hold.

Gwaine drops down in front of him, kicking Kanen’s body aside to make room. The bloody knife doesn’t even register with Gwaine, he’s so fixedly staring at the terrible slash in the side of the boy’s neck. He feels himself reaching up and covering it with his hand, trying to stop the blood, but it just pumps wetly between his fingers.

In no time at all, his little body goes limp, and all Gwaine can do is catch him, and stare into his bloodless face as he takes his last breath.

That’s how one of the settlers finds them, and that’s how all hell breaks loose.

No one realises that it wasn’t Gwaine who killed the child. Or maybe they do, but that doesn’t matter because they’re all Devils anyway, aren’t they? One as wretched as the next. That’s why it doesn’t matter to them who’s responsible. In their mind, they’re all the same – and they abused and killed one of their children.

The rest of them – Leon, Lance, the other two whose names Gwaine never really bothers remembering, and Gwaine himself – are dragged into the middle of the settlement. The other two die first, and then the settlers are going for Leon. Gwaine supposes their plan was to make him watch while they kill the others before finishing him off, but then they stab Leon in the eye, and Gwaine sees red.

All the anger and pain that’s been bottled up inside him for twenty years finally breaks loose, and he doesn’t care anymore that these people are innocent victims, that they have a right to be angry and vengeful. He cares that they’re hurting one of the men who means more to him than anything else in this godforsaken shithole.

He doesn’t know how, but in the end, most of the settlers are injured or worse; Leon’s in the backseat of the car with Lance stopping the bleeding while Gwaine races the car back to Camelot where Doc can save Leon’s life.

It takes hours to save what’s left of Leon’s face. Gwaine doesn’t wait until Leon wakes up, doesn’t deserve to be there when he does, so he finds a spot where no one will disturb him, and takes the sharpest knife he has to make sure that he’s marked for what he did, too. Marked where people will see, and know that he’s fucked up.

Again it’s Lance who takes care of the bleeding and then takes him to Doc to have his face sewn up. Doc’s not happy about any of it, but he does it and at least he isn’t gentle about it. The scars will be knobbly and thick and Gwaine’s glad about that. He shouldn’t have got away unscathed, and now his face will forever show that he didn’t.

It’s not enough to make the guilt go away though, and Gwaine still dreams about the little boy, and about Leon’s screams. Maybe, one day, he’ll finally be able to look into the mirror and sees his disfigured face, and forgive himself for what happened that night.

One day. Maybe.

**Author's Note:**

> Gwaine catches a Devil in the act of sexually abusing a young child. Gwaine shoots the Devil, but didn't realise that the Devil was holding a knife to the child's throat. The child bleeds out in Gwaine's arms. Gwaine is held responsible for the child's death, and in the following chaos, Leon gets stabbed in the eye. Later, Gwaine uses a sharp knife to cut into the skin of his face.


End file.
